Cream Socks

For the person who wants to wear white socks, but doesn’t want to be seen as the kind of person who wears white socks. We’ve got news for you: they’re still white socks, and no gentlemen should ever been seen in a pair outside of a sports venue.

Back in the 1980s, when was a mere germ of and idea (essentially because nobody had quite got around to inventing the internet), there was a short period when white and cream socks were fashionable and indeed encouraged. At least one member of the Socked staff had a white jacket, white jeans, white socks and white shoes. When he stood still, people mistook him for a signpost. Now older and wiser, he has seen the error of his ways and only wears the finest black cotton socks, which set off the white jeans superbly.

Cream socks do have their uses, however. Gentlewomen find them useful for formal occasions; while they are also ideal on the squash court or as part of your cricket whites. At Hallowe’en, they’re also useful as part of a ghost costume, as ghosts – by and large – don’t wear black socks.

The only true downside of cream socks is that people might think you not only wear white socks, but also never wash them. Avoid this trap by only ever wearing black socks from

Celebrity Wearer: TV’s Harry “Loadsamoney!” Enfield